There is almost nothing I enjoy more than an afternoon tea with my mother, grandmother, or sisters. Ever since I can remember, tea time has been an occasion (when celebrated) punctuated by a spirit of restfulness and contentment.
When I was about ten, I received one of my most prized possessions – a porcelain white English tea set, complete with six octagonally-shaped cups, and a bodacious pot for holding steamy brews. The tea set was an instant hit with me and my younger sister. On cold winter afternoons, we would heat up bowls of clam chowder and put out a few cookies to serve alongside our steeped beverages. We would convince our mom to join us for an hour or two of sipping, conversation, and imagining. Amidst the winter lulls, this experience of tea time was a delight, and it let us temporarily forget the bitter cold.
For me, the notion of tea time conjures images of Victorian ladies, English gardens, and Tchaikovsky. As a child enjoying a cup of tea and a few sweet treats, I would feel as though I had been transported to the 18th-century world of bustles, corsets, and lace napkins. I would stretch out my hand, and a tall young lad might whisk me away from my chair and pull me out onto the veranda for a stroll. Or, my sister and I might gallop along with a pack of horses or take a quick ride on a carousel, like the scene in Mary Poppins where Poppins, Burt, Jane, and Michael jump into Burt’s street-chalk drawing.
Today, having tea brings back fond memories of favorite pastimes, time spent fabricating intricate adventures that might last all day long, or enjoying a favorite book curled up in the wicker rocking chair in my family’s sunroom.
Just before it got cold each fall, my family used to vacation at a rustic inn in the mountains of North Carolina. Every afternoon, we would head over to the main hall for tea, hot cocoa, and board games. My parents would lounge by the fire, recalling the day’s experiences and scanning the newspaper. Meanwhile, my siblings and I would cackle over a round of checkers, or feast on the snacks and treats that accompanied our hot beverages. We were in what felt like a giant wood cabin straight out of the days of America’s early settlers, except that it was outfitted with modern conveniences such as heat and insulation. Although not the busiest of times, afternoon tea moments – like these at this mountain lodge – are some of my favorite memories.
As I have grown older, my fondness for tea time has continued, and I have come to realize that it is much more than a childhood game. Just a few months ago, my mother and two youngest sisters came to visit me in Charlottesville. Mid-afternoon on Saturday, we headed off to tea at a local inn. Luxurious antique chairs, a darkly-colored oriental rug, and a big fireplace framed by an ornate mantle were the backdrop for our late-day affair. At ten and fourteen, my sisters loved the chance to dress fancily and play grownup for a few hours.
As we lounged in our oversized seats, waiting for our drinks to steep, our server brought out a tiered tray full of tiny sandwiches, pastries, and tarts for us to munch on. As side notes to the occasion, there was also clotted cream, lemon curd, and a generous dish of fresh marmalade for us to spread on our baked delights. All of this was a true feast, and the whole afternoon felt like a luxurious blessing. The time passed slowly and we enjoyed one another’s company, oohing and aahhing over the delicious spread before us and reminiscing about distant memories. We remarked on the events of our day and made plans for the next, but with no real agenda in mind, just taking the opportunity to unwind and delight.
Teatime is about much more than just the tea or the food. It is about a welcoming of friends to the banquet, a relishing in community, a chance to be still in the busyness of life. Such moments are not just mere accessories to the rest of life; they are, in fact, part of the deep substance that comprises our humanity.
And tea often involves a bit of fanfare. Ladies dress up for tea. Fancy tablescapes are the norm, complete with eloquently-stitched runners, delicate flowers in vases, and fluffy napkins carefully slipped inside silver rings. Our senses are awakened through rich scents, sights, and tastes. Encouraging participants to savor elaborate beauty, rich flavors, and thoughtful design, the aesthetics of a tea party can sharpen our perceptions and deepen our artistic roots.
Today, tea time is an underappreciated art form. There are those with a handle on the concept – particularly those in Asia – but we’ve mostly lost its wonder here in the West. In the old days, tea could serve as a time to reflect on the experiences of the day, or as a moment to inspire action through those hours that remained. Friends could share a few laughs, and families could take some time away from the busyness of the day.
Amidst the hustle, bustle, scurry of modern life, the notion of tea time stands as a beacon of hope, serving as a way to punctuate and accentuate our day-to-day affairs. In contrast to a rush-and-go mentality, a good cup of tea always takes several minutes to steep; otherwise its flavor will be lacking. Whether taken alone or taken with friends, tea time can help us become more intentional, more perceptive people. Taking time for tea may help us cultivate the patience to wait for those things that cannot yet be, and help us better appreciate the lingering whiffs of a beauty that can only be sniffed when one takes a big, deep breath.